Moving on to recent years, what is past, let it be bygone be bygone...hehehe..Before I had my own child, I thought when I have one, my mom will treat my child the same treatment as my nieces and nephews. Alas, not even the next generation of mine gets to change the cycle. She shows obvious dislike and discomfort of having my son around. Is ok and I can accept and tolerate that she shows favouritism over my bros than me. I am already get used to it and like I said, I have forgiven her and accept my blessings instead of moody over petty issues :) But my son is innocent young boy. I hate and heartache whenever she shows un-love and rude-ness towards him.
My mom loves and dots my nieces and nephews in exaggerate ways. She will always use same excuse to tell people why she never gets close or carries my son eventhough she would love to - the mega excuse is because my son scratches her so she is afraid to be near to him. But she never carries or near neither talks nor plays with him when he was a baby. Only helped to carry a few times when he cried non stop for some discomfort. She always dumps him to maid and ignore him entirely. She never leaves behind my nieces or nephews to maid solely. She will dots on them herself only pass to maid when necessary and also with strict guidance when she was not around and she always put her ears up to check on maid and the baby status. With my child, she always knew zero things about him and always refer to maid when i asked about him. Since I have to work, I leave behind my son with maid at my mom's place. I am so disheartened whenever I ask about my son after work, she knows nothing and refer me to maid. Even complains my dad spends more time with my son instead of maid. Whenever my dad gets close to my son, she will crop up with something and get him away from my son. She will show her angry face and temper rise if my dad delays her. There goes again, when this happen, she will lash out on me and my son to show me how unhappy she is that my dad spends time on my son.
Even during confinement, she complains alot and I am not being taken care well so did my son. She will not scold or show her angry face to confinement lady or maid if they are caring my nieces/nephews/sis in laws. She will talk nicely to them and treat them well. However, on me and my son, she always on constant fight & restriction on confinement lady/maid. Within a month, change 2 confinement ladies and the last my maid ran off because of her too. Me alone handling my son is ok. But at times need someone to help me watch over him while i pack or away for awhile. She does not lend a hand. Instead scold him and chase him out of work room after she knocked him down. He hit on marble floor with big bump and a little scratch. Often when dad not around, I have to leave him alone while I am away for awhile. My nieces and nephews come with 2 parents but she will eat early as she said she needs to help carry the young ones so that my bros and sis in laws can prep food to feed the eldest. What about me? Alone? I need to settle myself and my son all by myself as my hubby works late during working days only able to help on weekends. She will single handed-ly do things for my bros and their family. Eg. She always will put a hanky downstairs to convenient them when they come but when I alone, she never thought of helping. I always come home with my son after work/school then I am on a rushing chores till bedtime. I have to tell her next time please help me put a hanky downstairs since I need it when I get back. She told me all the while she never touch on my son's welfare. ???? what kinda mom is this?..I know I sounded absurd why the hassle, everyone can handle alone...I can too just that the house is not child friendly..my mom does not want to make it child friendly..so is abit difficult at times that is why at times need an adult around.
Another eg. last time when my nephew around the age like my son now, always will play with hangers..So she got the maid to move all the hangers upstairs and covered by blanket. Now my son's turn, she has the guts to warn maid and me and my dad not to let him touch the hangers which she still keeps upstairs. Can't she moves away like she did when my nephew was 2 yrs +? Why mine needs to be warned? My dad always like to get my son to call my mom - poh poh - cause my mom ignores him...She will brush him off and tell my dad not to disturb her as she is busy...plus tells my dad rudely not to carry him near her later scratch her...She is on constant argument and speak loudly when my dad is carrying him or caring him. I remembered clearly, last time she spoke very softly and never argue with my dad in front of my nephew. She said not to do such in front of toddler, not good and too loud not good for his eardrum. I guess my son is made up of a doll material..is ok for the eardrum to be cracked or so whatsoever...hahaha..
eg. when she accidentally made my nephew fell while playing circle, she would tell whole world how sorry she is and guilty she is. when she knocked mine down, she just silence and could not be bothered. I am the one who told my dad if not i guess he would not know.
eg. she went to my nephew's school to check out the environment and even spoke to the teachers there. mine, she did not do so even I asked whether she wants to see the environment or not. She said next time and the next time never come. Once, was her slave until lunch time, after lunch I drove her straight to my son's school to pick him up. Unbelievable, she said if she knew I am going to school, she would have asked me to drop her off first before I headed to school. She always gets my dad to fetch my nephew to lighten my bro and sis in law burden instead of rushing to fetch him. She wants my dad to fetch my nephew to her so that she can care and dot on him. Mine?? well needless to say this never happens. Even I share my son's status with her, she just silence and changes topic. If my bros they all share, am pretty sure she goes on and on with the topic...lol..
That is why I am always uphappy and really find it difficult to be nice to her like I used to be. When she sense I am on a bad mood, she will ignore my son even my son is crying out for attention as I place him inside his cot while I am away as no one helps me around. On good days, she will entertain us abit. How ugly she is to us?..
hhmmpp...is ok...because no one is perfect. I rather she mistreats me than God takes away my other blessings :):)...I am a blessed girl so far. I hope my bless can be handed over to my kids :) Now, they need more than I do :) If I am to be blessed with a girl next, I will not bestow what I am suffering all these years. I am a strong anti-chauvinism :) Everyone deserves equal treatment regardless of their background, color, gender, bla bla...
Conclusion, I am so proud of myself that I am fulltime working mom and yet cater to my son's need till bedtime - all single handedly :)
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