EXACTLY..!!!!! I now send my son to a new school. He has been going to this school for the past 1 month. In my blog, I will only mention the impacts of both schools upon my son. Without stating the school name. Ced started going to pre-school when he was age 2. I was lucky that he did not fuss when going to school, instead, he likes going to school. Unlike other parents, I did not have issue sending him to school. At least, in the past. He would very delighted to get off the car and carried his own bag and walked into the school compound all by himself. When he started using more words, he would wave and say byebye mummy! and disappeared into his school :) That was the most longing memory I had. As several months had past, the school announced new management was taking over and new teachers were replacing the existing ones. Since then, my son slowly showed signed of being abused and gradually LOATHE SCHOOL!!!
How do I know for sure that he was being abused in school?! I used to hire a maid just to look after him since he was a baby. I had googled and read alot on signs of being abused. As I know that I would leave him behind with maid while my husband & I went for work and out. At least signs were the good guidelines for me to know his welfare while we were not around. Fret not, we always left him with maid at my parents place. So, all was well :) Without further ado, let me share my experiences:-
Ced started to unwilling to get off the car. With more coaxing, he eventually would get down. This had been awhile for almost a month before he moved into Stage 2 severity. He then told me he did not want to go to school once he woke up. Then again, lingered more time when reached the school. A month was up, for the next month was my worst nightmare of sending him to school. He would cry and fuss from home till school. Once reached school, he would cry even louder and screamed and worst, refused to get into the school compound at all!!!!! It was so heart-wrenching when my son would screamed for me and called out my name so thunderous and cried so hysterically when I left, that it sparked me that he surely was being abused in school. His screamed was not normal misbehaving type, it was more on MUMMY, HELP!!! I asked the principal and teachers there of why he had sudden attitude changed, all they did was only to convince me he was all right after I left. I did not know why out of a sudden, 2 teachers came to me and leaked out that one of the teachers there beat him before and they looked so worried facial expression. After I probed more, they refused to tell me. I was even more convinced that my worried was right. As my son always will come home telling us what happen in school such as, "teacher ta-ta (beat), teacher ma-ma (scold)", I purposely told the principal that my son always tells us things. Only then, she admitted to me that one day she was in bad mood and yet my son refused to nap. So, she popped a ballon right on top of my son's head just to scare him. And she did twice!!! So, off I go school hunting again to look for a new school for my son. I know that if I do not change the environment, it will only give more negative impacts on my son's growth welfare. Ced used to have nightmares daily and even talked in his sleep. He said "teacher pu yau (don't)" several times and cried in his sleep. From a jovial toddler, he changed to bad tempered and stubborn.
At new school, I can only say I am truely impressed with the school. Even my husband agreed and said lucky we changed him to new school. Only a few days here in new school, Ced portrays much calm attitude. He does not come home brandishing or lashing or releasing hatred or upsets. He does not have nightmares and does not cry or talk in his sleep. Just last night, I heard him laughing twice in his sleep :) He used to wake up angrily and crying. But no more now. For the past week, he has been eating by himself without me feeding and he eats quite clean :) He does not allow me to brush his teeth neither him brush by himself. After school taught him, automatically, he brushes his teeth at home too :) He even reminded me was time to brush teeth once. hehehe..He talks more now. I found out that he uses more words and he uses the words correctly. He can now talk longer statement instead of single word expression. Quite a huge step improvement. Comparatively to old school, attended 6 months and yet see not much advancement.
Well, things do not always work along your plan or wish. He still refuses to go to school. Every morning is like a warzone at home between him and I. Take longer time now as I do not want to force him too much which resulted him crying all the time. I will just keep convincing him as much as I can or I shall say, as much as he lets me talk to him. Cause, sometimes, he does not want us to reason with him with our grandmother stories :) BUT. hehehe, aahhh yes, my but is in capitals, because how unwilling he is with me at home or how he struggles not to get into my car, upon reaching school, when principal approaches my car to take him into school compound, he will always go to the principal with open arms..hahaha...funny isn't it? He will obediently wave and say byebye mummy..he is crying lesser now and once he did not cry at all. One thing for sure, he did not scream anymore. He talks to the teachers there and wave byebye and willing to say byebye teacher when I fetch him from school. Comparatively, he refused and never talk or wave or say byebye teacher at his old school. Even the teachers in old school said byebye to him, he just turned away. Now, in this new school, whenever teachers talk to him, he will have eye contact with them and nod or said zhi tao (know). I realized Ced is more discipline after attending this new school. I just hope, he will one day finally come to term that he needs to go to school no matter what. And this day, please come fast!!! hehehehe...
A little adventure - after I stopped Ced from his old school, an old teacher Ced always clinged on to called me using her own personal line. She told me she had since resigned from that school and asked me why Ced stopped school. I do not know how she comes by the news. After sharing what I wrote above, she said yes. The reason she resigned was she cannot accept new management style. You will be in shocked when you read what I am about to leak:- Kids there are like being confined into a prison cell life-like. There is this teacher called 'L' who is very fierce towards the kids and typically the kids there spend their time in class, after class will go down for meal time, after meal time must sit tightly on their chair. Whoever moves, will be scolded and beaten. Hence, this old teacher told me that this is Kindyland not Standard 1. Kids at such age how can they sit still? They must play around and cannot only have class and eat and still. She strongly disagrees with such cruel treatment. The more she fights for the kids welfare, the more complaints she received from L. L will report the matter to management and subsequently, this old teacher resigned. She also hinted that Ced knows alot of things and he knows the teachers' names. She said you try to ask him which teacher beats him, and he will say Teacher L. Those 2 teachers also mentioned Teacher L mistreated him. Without them telling me, I already suspected so. As, right from the start, Teacher L already showed disliked towards Ced. Each time she tried to come near Ced, Ced went hysterically afraid and despise her to get close to her. My son is an active kid, must be L cannot tolerate such behaviour. Resulting her using harsh actions against my son. But, to me this is unethical for a pre-school teacher. When I went to submit letter of withdrawing from school (requested to do so by the branch director there for refund deposit purposes), a kid ran here and there before hitting a toy and felled hurting his side pelvis. Teacher L said 'who ask you to run?' several times before proceeding to say 'veli good la veli good la'. OMG! what English is this? Another surprising part was she never even bothered to go to the kid to check him out. When his mother approached, she quickly came forward and pat the kid's head and told his mom how good he is at school today. The poor boy was still holding his pelvis and half cried towards his mother and I overheard him telling his mother 'veli good'. LOL...Oh yeah, when the school started to suspect me knowing something had gone wrong, out of a sudden Teacher L tried to be nice and coaxed Ced when I dropped him off. Usually she would not come attend. She gave up when Ced refused to be close to her. She just walked away, lucky I was still there for my son to come for solace before another teacher saw what was happening and came to coax my son. Another point deducted as a pre-school teacher. To me, one must have patience and kindness as well as caring other wise how one can be a pre-school teacher? I also found out that the kids were getting lesser. The old teacher told me many of the kids have transferred to another nearby Kindyland. This new management had asked for additional payment. The school fees already expensive than the others and yet required me to top up more for school holidays program. Whereby, in new school, school fee is cheaper, holiday programs is 1 time off payment for 1 year school holidays programs. The best part is new school has school trip outing once a month to different location.
So to all parents out there who are reading my blogs, please be aware. School and teachers are very important/critical to our pre-school kids. Whether your kids be cheerful/sad, socialable/not are very much depending on the people around them. Proper educating, toddlers especially age 2.5-3 or even by 4/5, can show positive/negative growth. Just like what I have just shared above. Observation is also another critical action parents need to bear in mind. A good school will produce cheerful and bright students while degradable school will only produce hatred and crush attitude/character of the students. Please compare more schools' timetable before deciding which school to send your kids to. If you are the type unlucky to hit the right jackpot (school) for your kids, is ok and best to change. Find one that your kids adapt well to.
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